Thursday, July 5, 2018

How the Lord Led Me to Specialize in Psychiatry


One of the questions many people ask me, is why and how I chose to specialize in Psychiatry. During the days of my training in MBBS, I did not have any interest in the field of Psychiatry. But rather, I was averse to Psychiatry because I got the impression from many spheres that this is a field for those who do not have any faith in God and that psychiatrists are those who try to explain faith also as a mere neurochemical phenomenon.


Anyway, the Lord Jesus had to intervene supernaturally in my life on 20th April 2009 through a vision in order to guide me to this fascinating and marvelous field of Psychiatry! (I need to add a sentence here that although there are genuine visions and dreams from the Lord, I am skeptical about the so many so-called visions and dreams many people testify, extending the boundaries of their imagination as well as trying to make up some meaning from their meaningless dreams). 


On 2009 April 19th night I was taking casualty duty in one Aravind Hospital, Chavara, nearby my native place. There were so many patients visiting casualty that time, that I could have my dinner only at about 12: 30 am. And there were patients till about 1: 15 am.


By about 1: 15 am, I came to the duty room very much tired physically, but afresh spiritually because that afternoon I had just finished a two and a half days’ Life Revision Seminar by Dr Kuruvilla Varkey from Christian Fellowship Hospital, Oddanchatram, Tamil Nadu. Though I thought of going to the bed soon (because one cannot predict when the next patient will come), I was prompted by the Lord to spend a little more time with Him, conversing with Him and worshipping Him.


I was just worshipping the Lord and delighting in His presence with my eyes closed. After some time I was seeing a vision of multitude of poor, helpless, needy people, sitting in darkness and pathetically crying out for help..... I saw two faces more or less clearly: one that of a 60 – 70 year old man and another that of a 7 – 8 year old little girl. The Lord flooded my heart with compassion for all of them, and I was convinced deeply in my heart that the Lord wanted to touch them through me. Suddenly the thought of specializing in Psychiatry became very much alive in my heart (because 12 hours ago, that is, around 1: 15 pm of April 19th afternoon, Dr. Kuruvilla Varkey had suggested to me the option of specializing in Psychiatry, as I was speaking with him after the Life Revision Seminar. But I had no interest in it when he told me about this option).


After I saw this vision, I was telling the Lord: “Lord, if it is your will, I am willing to venture into whatever field You choose for me. But You need to clarify to me the same, because I do not want to drag a subject which I do not like all the rest of my life”. Immediately I felt an inner urge to open the Bible which was lying near me. I thought of turning the pages of the Bible to whatever portion the Lord was prompting me to go. The page I opened from the Bible was starting with Isaiah 50: 2, which reads like: Why was there no man when I came? When I called, why was there none to answer? ...”. I understood that the Lord is indicating that He is calling me to something. The subsequent part of verse 2 and verse 3 spoke of the Lord’s almighty power. Verse 4 reads like this:


“The Lord God has given Me the tongue of disciples, that I may know how to sustain the weary one with a word. He awakens Me morning by morning, He awakens My ear to listen as a disciple”.


When I read the word ‘tongue’ in the 4th verse, I was shocked, because it was just 12 hours ago that Dr Kuruvilla Varkey was speaking to me about Christian Counselling.  The phrase “how to sustain the weary one with a word” confirmed to me my calling to Psychiatry. And this is the best verse on true psychotherapy (counselling) that I have found in the entire Bible.


Another interesting thing is that even the rest of verse 4 about the Lord ‘awakening me morning by morning, and awakening my ear to listen as a disciple’ was literally fulfilled. It was the Lord Who literally woke me up morning by morning those few days as it was mentioned in that verse. Far earlier than the alarm clock rang, the Lord Jesus amazingly woke me up from sleep in the early mornings of three days before and one day after this vision; that is, 17th, 18th, 19th and 20th of April 2009. On some days, the Lord woke me up around 3 O’ clock and 5 O’ clock in the mornings although I had gone to bed very late in the preceding nights. I was so fresh in my mind when I was woken up by the Lord, that even though I tried to sleep after waking up, I was not able to do so. I could spend quality time with the Lord those mornings.


Even the subsequent portion of Isaiah 50 was literally fulfilled. Verse 5 and 6 speaks about opposition, which I initially faced from my parents because they initially did not like me specializing in Psychiatry. Verse 7 to 9 speaks about the Lord helping me, which was fulfilled when the Lord Himself suddenly changed their minds to support me about my new decision.


Verse 10 speaks about trusting in the Lord in the midst of uncertainty, which was fulfilled when there was a period of one month of uncertainty when there was no vacancy for Non PG seat in the department of Psychiatry in CMC, Vellore, where Dr Kuruvilla Varkey suggested me to join. Soon the uncertainty was over since the Lord Himself created a vacancy there when a doctor in the department chose to go for his Sabbatical leave exactly at the ‘right’ time. Amazing are the Lord’s ways!


In the evening that followed the night I had the vision, I phoned up my mentor and spiritual father, Br Geoji T Samuel, (who is the elder at Christian Fellowship Church, Kottayam – www.cfckottayam.org and Senior Editor at Malayala Manorama newspaper). He told me: “Three times in the last one week I spoke at three different occasions that ‘we need professional psychiatric help for this’ when different people approached us for different problems. So, brother, please do the specialization, be competent in the field and come back. The church needs your service. One more thing: usually when I hear testimonies about visions and dreams, I feel a bit skeptical. But when I heard about your experience, I felt so free in my spirit.” These words encouraged, blessed and strengthened me tremendously.


Eventually, by the Lord’s grace, I joined in CMC, Vellore as Non PG, cleared the entrance exams and did my DPM and MD in Psychiatry! Every day from April 20th 2009 proves to me my calling into this field! I can honestly say before the Lord Jesus that I enjoy being a Psychiatrist, being an instrument in the Lord’s hands to perceive the depths of agony and anguish in many minds, and to bring a healing touch from the Lord in those numerous lives…


I am a witness to many miraculous recoveries, healings and deliverances (including demons being cast out! https://sandeeppsychiatry.blogspot.com/2018/03/casting-out-of-demon-in-psychiatry-opd.html) in my practice of Psychiatry.


The very next day of my receiving the appointment order and joining in the Department of Psychiatry in CMC, Vellore, on May 23rd, 2009, Saturday morning, the Lord paraphrased John 15: 16 from my daily Bible meditation, like this: “You did not choose Psychiatry, but I chose it for you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit, that your fruit may remain, that whatever you ask of the Father in My name, He may give to you”. Looking back I am seeing the fruit that remains. And I am expecting all the more fruit in the days to come, leaning on the Lord’s marvelous mercies and abundant grace! 

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